Sidebar: Omar's last night and the crowd mourned.

I'm dreading this one.

Seriously, I'm going to need some seriously upbeat music to trudge through this recap.. hold on a sec..

There we go.

If you see a commercial before that starts, I wonder if it's going to have the guy with the long beard in it. He's been in all the ads lately.

Right.

So Monday at Sidebar was weird. It started off decently, but after seven or so comics the crowd just stopped caring. It wasn't straight out heckling or anything. There was definitely some side conversations as it seemed people were more interested in talking to each other than pay attention to who was up on stage; but that seemed mainly focused in the back alcove.

But even then, it wasn't like they were over whelming the audio, it was just like speaking to a brick wall.

A brick wall that mainly laughed at video game references, comics expressing regret that their jokes weren't going over well that night and little else.

Let's back up a little bit. I'm making the night sound bad, but it wasn't a total wash. I commuted for the first time with other comedians (Joe Greenway and Chris Colletti) and got to talk shop. It's reassuring to hear other people voice the same concerns and dreams as you, makes you feel less insane for wanting to get up in front of a crowd and try to make them laugh.

As we all slowly funneled ourselves onto the stage and then off it to retreat to our compatriots and discuss our feelings on what just transpired; I realized while my anticipation was rising, my fear was not. That was pretty uplifting. I was comfortable on that stage, in front of these people.

I began my set by giving Luke Marshall a shoulder massage while he awkwardly introduced me. Kathy Carson shouted at him to relax and let it happen. The crowd was laughing and I tried to amp it up higher by channeling energy straight into the mass of humanity in front of me.

They weren't buying what I was selling.

I didn't feel it was fake energy.. listening to it, I feel like I sound genuine. By the way, this is excruciating to listen to. I've had to pause four times so far and I'm only two minutes into a four minute recording. And besides my own voice, all that you can hear is silence from the crowd. The only laughs are from the intro and the reference to video games.

Attempts at telling jokes are abandoned about halfway and I tell them about Twitch Plays Pokemon, which they approve of. I then express sadness at Omar Shaukat's impending move to NYC but I think he was outside smoking. (Good luck again, buddy!)

The light is given. Luke Marshall comes to announce the next comic. I remove my shirt.

Pandemonium results.

The people did not want comedy this night. No, they wanted nipples with eyebrows.

So in the end, what did I learn?

Beats me.

Nice farmer's tan, you cracker.